Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
