Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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