i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
