forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
