I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Randomize
