So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
