Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Randomize
