I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
