im gay
i know
yea but for you.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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