I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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