Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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