At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He called his prostate his "boner button".
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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