Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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