she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
