VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
