dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize