Nicole vs. Life
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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