Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
