i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
