Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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