just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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