oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
