Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Is Oprah even human
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
