ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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