North Korea, Best Korea!
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Randomize
