Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
