Define "chronic" masturbator.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
