Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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