This girl is more easily done than said...
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
