I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize