There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I still have a little drunk in my system
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
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