i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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