my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
