Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
