If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
My feet surprised me
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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