After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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