Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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