Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
