I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
