i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
