Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
