I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
