Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
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