The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
