So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
