new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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