it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
wow bdsm is so cute
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