just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Someone signed my nipple.
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