at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
