if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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